By: Erick

"Ha? Eh ano ba talaga kayo?" Tanong ni Cheryl as she eats a home made sandwich.

"Friends with benefits nga… He told me bisexual siya, na… nalilibugan siya sa lalaki pero sa babae lang daw siya nagkakagusto." I answered as I shrug my shoulders. "Wag ka nga diyan sa kama ko kumain, dugyot ka pa naman."

"That's bullshit." sagot niya and she stood beside me at the terrace. "Pero alam mo, hindi ko nahalatang bi si Brendan ah. I mean we talk kapag may meeting ang mga committee pero akala ko talaga lalaki siya…" She speaks with her mouth full. "Alam mo ba talaga ginagawa mo?" She added.

"You know I don't always know what I'm doing."

"Look Pert. These past few years, life has been so tough for you. Ayaw lang kitang… alam mo na?" she talks as she rolls her eyes.

"Ano? Ano nga?"

"Ayaw lang kitang… I mean, you know? Hindi ka pa nga fully recovered from what happened to your mom, heto ka na naman. This could hurt you so bad and as your bestfriend I don't want to see you getting hurt."

"I appreciate it, really. Pero….think about it, I'm getting older and siguro ung masaktan? It's part of growing up. It's part of life…. Maybe… pain is inevitable."

Binatukan ako ng malakas ni Cheryl "Make sure lang na you're matured enough to enter that kind of relationshit. Wag kang mahulog sa mga ganyan, fuckboy amputa."

Cheryl is my bestfriend. Siya yung pangatlong nakausap ko nung first day of college and since then naging magkaibigan na kami. Siya ang unang sinabihan ko kung ano man ang meron kami ni Brendan.

"Anyway, invited pala tayo sa debut ni Erin. 2 weeks from now, you should come."

"Huh tayo? eh ikaw lang naman ang ka close niya kasi committee ka eh."

"Hello! Nakalimutan mo na bang crush ka nun? Tska nag cha chat naman kayo eh. Ayaw mo yun? Andun kaya si Brendan."

"Shut up, Cheryl."

"Sumama ka na! Kasi two seats ang pinareserve sakin nakalagay sa invitation ko. Para sa'yo talaga yun. Ikaw na lang ang regalo ko sa kanya I'm broke af."

Nagpatuloy ang ganung set up namin ni Brendan. My feelings started to grow deeper, faster than I've expected. As long as I suppress it lalo lang lumalala pero for some reasons kuntento na ko sa kung anong kaya ibigay ni Brendan. Sex ang naging center ng kung ano man meron kami. Although minsan nakekwento niya sa'kin yung ka MU niyang babae na si Lenor, at nakekwento ko rin sa kanya na minsan china chat ako ni Erin, which is ayaw niya since kaibigan niya si Erin and we're friends. WITH BENEFITS.
Sex Sex.Sex.Shower sex.Sex.Car sex.Sex

"Ilang beses ko na sinabi kay Erin na tigilan ka na eh." sambit ni Brendan habang nakasandal siya sa headboard ng kama ko at nag ba browse ng feed.

"Bakit naman? Type ko naman si Erin eh." tanong ko naman habang nakaupo ako katabi niya at gumagawa ng report sa laptop.

"Eh kasi… it's just not right! She's my friend and you're my friend."

"Oh anong mali dun?"

"You're just not my friend… alam mo na?" He looked at me na nakakunot ang noo.

"Ano nga?" Pangungulit ko naman sa kanya

"Eh nauna na ko sa'yo eh!" He mumbled.

"Huh?" I asked with my cheeks blushing.

"Wala! Gawin mo na yan! Sabi ko sabay na tayo pumunta sa debut ni Erin."

"Ahh eh kasabay ko yung kaibigan ko eh, si Cheryl. You know her, diba? Committee rin yun"

Hindi lang naging madalas ang pagse sex namin ni Brendan kundi pati na rin ang pag hang out namin. Minsan nagse selos na nga si Cheryl dahil parang mas bestfriend ko na daw si Brendan. Dumating na yung gabi na debut ni Erin. I wasn't that excited since I don't know much about her at dalawang beses pa lang ata kami nag usap nun and the rest is chat lang. Ginanap ang debut niya sa isang Hotel. The venue was huge with a capacity of hundred people. May Red carpet at malaking LED screen na parang sa showtime. May mga nakasabit from high ceilings which are her pre debut photos. The screen opened as the sign of her entrance and the smoke becomes thicker while she appears with her lavender silk gown. She comes down from the stairs and she sat on her gold single high couch. After some of the traditional shits ay binigay na rin ang main dish while the event continues to occur. Finally!

"Damn! You look fine!" Bulong sa'kin ni Brendan na dumaan sa table namin. He's wearing a black suit and tie paired with white long sleeves since kasama siya sa 18 roses. While I wear my black coat with black polo inside na naka unbutton. Habang kumakain kami at nagsasalita ang 18 wishes ay inaya ako ni Brendan sa restroom.

"Tara cr tayo."

"Kumakain pa ko, kaya mo na yan."

"Halika na… Quickie tayo…"

Pumunta kami ni Brendan sa restroom at kakalabas lang ng isang janitor. Walang tao at doon kami gumawa ng milagro.
Pumasok kami sa isang cubicle and he kisses my lips down to my neck. Pinaupo niya ko sa toilet bowl na naka sarado syempre, tska siya lumuhod siya at minadaling tanggalin ang belt ko, he unzipped my pants and he started to suck my dick as fast as he could but yet, still smooth as fuck.

"Ugh.." I mumbled at bigla niyang tinakpan ang bibig ko.

"Shhh… baka may makarinig sa'tin"

"Fuck, malapit na ko…" Pinutok ko sa bibig ni Brendan lahat ng katas ko at walang arte ay nilunok niya to lahat.

Tumayo siya and siya naman ang naglabas ng alaga niya. I sucked his dick real good as I sat on the toilet bowl. Napapa nganga si Brendan but he didn"t make a sound, even once. Dineep throat ko siya at nakita ko siya napakagat ng labi, later on his dick got even harder at napa ungol na siya ng mahina which is a sign na malapit na siya. Sunod sunod na putok ang nilabas niya and I didn't have a choice but to swallow it all. Agad agad kaming nag ayos at bumalik sa room with a smile on our faces.

"Ang tagal niyo, saan kayo galing?" Cheryl whispered, pagkaupo na pagkaupo ko pa lang.

"Nag cr lang kami."

"Ano yan…" Cheryl stared at my mouth at pinunasan niya ang lower lip ko ng thumb niya.

"Is this… semen? What the fuck?!" Cheryl mumbled at nakita ko ang diring diri na facial expression niya. Nataranta siya at tila di niya alam saan magpupunas ng kamay. Kinuha niya ang table napkin at nanghiram ng alcohol…

"Cheryl, kumalma ka nga. Shut up! Manahimik ka lang."

"You expect me to calm down with semen on my hand that literally came from your mouth? Seriously?" Inis na inis niyang bulong sakin and I can't help but to laugh it out.

"Oo na, oo na. Oh ayan malinis na… Kumalma ka na…"

"My Gash! Di ba kayo makapaghintay? What's with you guys?" inis na inis na sambit ni Cheryl.

Tumingin ako sa kinauupuan ni Brendan ngunit wala siya dun. Nakita ko siya kasama si Lenor as they walk up towards the bar at kumuha ng maiinom. Fuck, mas masakit palang makita sila magkasama kesa sa kantutin ako magdamag ni Brendan. Natanggal ang ngiti sa mukha ko and I sat there with a blank face as I watch Brendan flirt with Lenor habang pabalik sila sa table nila. Si Cheryl naman picture ng picture with other girls. Pumunta ko sa bar tender and kumuha ng maiinom

"Isang tequila po." sambit ko as I stare at the visitors and wait for my order.

"Hi! Brendan… dba?" biglang sambit ng isang lalaki sa tabi ko. It was Dexter, the PRO of the student council. Ayos na ayos ang buhok niya at naka brush up. He has brown skin and black round eyes na may matangos na ilong. Morenong moreno, he has a toned body na bumabakat from his muscled fit polo na naka wrap up ang sleeves.He's about 5'7 tall and has this charismatic smile na sa tingin ko asset niya kaya siya binoto sa campus.

"Yup… Dexter, tama ba?"

"Yes, I am./Kuya! Coke & Rum please./" order ni Dex "Ba't mag isa ka lang?" tanong niya ngunit nginitian ko lang.

"Ikaw ba't mag isa ka lang?" I asked him back as he smiles with amusement.

"Ba't mo binalik sa'kin yung tanong?"

"Kasi hindi ko alam isasagot ko sa tanong mo eh."

"Oh.. is that supposed to be funny or sad?"

Diniretso kong ininom yung tequila. "Lemon? Gusto mo?" offer ko kay Dex na tinanggal ko pa mula sa shot glass ko.

"No thanks."

"It was nice to meet you Dex, babalik na ko sa table." sabi ko

"Sure, it was nice to meet you too." sagot naman niya.

Hindi ko namalayan tapos na pala yung event and the host announces na the dance floor is now already open. Mabagal ang paggalaw ng mga tao, pa onti onti ung pagpunta nila sa dance floor hanggang sa andun na halos lahat sila. Yung matatanda namang bisita ay umuwi na. Yung iba nandun sa bar umiinom at naglalandian. Inaya ako ni Cheryl magsayaw pero wala pa rin akong gana dahil nakikita ko pa rin si Brendan na kasama si Lenor and he seems to enjoy the night without even looking at me. I watch them as they dance at the center of the room with different color of lights touching their skin. They'd make a cute couple. Ang sagwa nga naman kung kaming dalawa yung nagsasayaw dun, at umpisa pa lang naman nilinaw na niya lahat. Fuck buddies lang kami that turned into friends with benefits, nothing more, nothing less.

"Lalim ata ng iniisip mo." pang iistorbo sa'kin ni Dex while he handed me a drink and he sat down beside me.

"Thank you…" I mumbled

"Ang ganda ni Erin ngayon noh" he replied.

"Yup. Kaya nanalo yan sa election eh, maganda na matalino pa."

"Gusto ka niyan, alam mo ba?"

"I know." malamig kong sagot

"Ilakad kita, gusto mo?"

And then I just responded with a smile.

Dex stood up and pagbalik niya ay dala dala niya si Erin. Nagulat ako sa ginawa ni Dex at halata sa mukha ni Erin na nahihiya siya. "Happy Birthday, Erin!" I greeted her despite of shock.

"Thank you… Rupert. Thank you for coming." Pagpapasalamat ni Erin. She had her hair down and yung kaninang long red gown niya ay umikli, since tinanggal niya ata yung lower part. She's now wearing a vivid red lipstick which doesn't suit her personality cos she's acting like a shy type in front of me.

Iniwan kaming dalawa ni Dex sa table. Ang awkward ng atmosphere. Hindi kami makapagusap ng maayos since maya't maya may dadaan at mag-greet sa kanya o kaya naman makikipag picture.

That night, si Erin lang ang kausap ko habang si Brendan ay enjoy na enjoy kasama si Lenor. Lumalalim na ang gabi at napaparami na kami ng inom ni Erin. Sunod sunod na shot ng tequila at iba ibang cocktail.

"You know what? I really really like you… Palagi nga kitang inii-stalk eh." those are the exact words that came out from her mouth at halatang lasing na siya.

I laughed a little kahit nakakaramdam na ko ng hilo. "Ang dami nga nagsabi sa'kin…" I replied

"WHAAAT?! Oh my gosh, who told you? Argh!…. Si Dex noh?…. Humanda sa'kin yon!" Mabigat na ang mga mata ni Erin but she still keeps on talking… "Rupert… Maganda ba ko? Do you feel the same way about me?"

"You look… You look fine, Erin. Maganda ka…" I said as I stare at her.

"Maganda? Hmmm…. I get that a lot. Pero alam mo… I don't want people to like me because of my looks…" She mumbled as she rested her face on the table at magkatitigan pa rin kami. "I dont want people to like me because of every shallow reason they have for themselves…" She said as she took another drink of her cocktail, bumibigat na rin ang mga mata ko but I still keep on listening "I don't want them to like me for who they think I am. I just want someone to like me because they like what they see underneath my skin…. Yung lalaking nakaka appreciate ng buong pagkatao ko, alam mo yun? Yung… yung gusto ako for some valid reason, yung gusto akong makilala, gusto akong makasama… gusto akong pahalagahan… gusto akong… mahalin."

I was speechless, she's showing a different side of her dala na rin siguro ng kalasingan. And I don't know what got into me as I stuttered "l… I could… be that guy…"

Erin stopped talking and stares at me for a while. She suddenly sits properly while she fixes her hair. Magkatitigan pa rin kami sa mata kahit napapapikit na ko and I feel like I'm gonna pass out. My eyes were about to close fully until she kissed my lips. I was shocked as my eyes became wide open and I had no idea what to do. It took me a while bago ako umalis sa pagkakadikit ng aming mga labi.

"Erin…" I mumbled habang magkatitigan pa rin kami.

"Pert halika na, lasing ka na." Brendan interrupted. Kinuha niya ang kamay ko at inakbay sa balikat niya as we stood up. "Erin thank you for tonight, ako na bahala dito kay Rupert." Banggit niya as we walked away.

Pagewang gewang kaming naglalakad ni Brendan as I stare at his face.

"What the hell were you thinking, Pert?" Bulong niya as he turned his eyes on me and we stopped walking.

"What??" Pagtataka kong tanong

"You fucking kissed her! What do you expect she would feel about it? Pinapaasa mo yung kaibigan ko eh."

"Siya humalik sa'kin… Besides, I liked it though…"

"So gusto mo na ngayon si Erin?" Inis na tanong niya.

"Ano bang… ano bang problema mo, Brendan? Huh?"

"Let's not talk about this right now, you're fucking drunk and you can't even barely handle a conversation."

"NO!" Pagpupumiglas ko kay Brendan

"Bakit ka ganyan? Ha? Ikaw ang paasa, tangina mo ka." I said loudly at naririnig ko pa yung echo ko since nakakabingi ang katahimikan sa parking lot.

"Let's go home" he replied as he tried to pull me close to him.

"I said no---"

"FUCK! PERT WE'RE GOING HOME, NOW!" He shouted and that left me speechless. I couldn't say a thing since natakot ako sa kanya. He was so mad I could see it through his eyes at wala akong magawa kundi hayaan siyang ipasok ako sa kotse niya. I was just watching him as he started the engine of his car.

"Galit ka ba?" mahina kong tanong

"No…" Malamig naman niyang sagot

Tahimik lang kami sa kotse magdamag habang bumabyahe. Suddenly, Brendan stopped the car in front of Frigoli

"Just wait here, bibili lang ako ng coffee" sambit niya

"Brendan… Gusto ko pumasok sa loob."

"Kaya mo na ba?" Tanong niya habang magkasalubong pa rin ang kilay niya. I simply nodded.

"Tara! Let's go buy some coffee." He murmured.

We entered the cafe and the scent was so relaxing. I missed the ambience of this place. We sat at the small table beside the wooden wall with a small yellow light hanging above.

"Anong gusto mo?" He asked

"Uhmm… Black Ivy, full cup."

After a few minutes, he returned with two cups of coffee and a plate of smores.

"Brendan, sorry kanina, I was so---"

"Don't be, hindi ako galit. Masakit pa ba ulo mo?" He said, interrupting me. "Lasenggo ka pala noh." Pagbibiro niya pa

"Medyo hilo pa rin pero okay na. Lasenggo? Tangina, hindi noh. " I replied as I grin. "Ikaw? Mukhang nag enjoy ka nga kasama si Lenor eh."

"Ulul" he murmured and giggled. "Sakto lang"

"You like her, don't you?" I asked, seriously

"Hmm, kind of? Not as much as I like you…" Tinignan ako ni Brendan sa mata at binigyan ng mapang asar na ngiti.

"Fuck you!" I whispered

"By the way, have you seen the Anatomy of Love? Parehas tayo ng prof sa English Lit dba?"

"Yung play na nire-require panoorin ni sir Hernandez? Hindi pa nga eh, pero nabigay niya na yung tickets."

"Let's go see it together? Equivalent to 1 quiz yon." Pag aya ni Brendan at parang nai-ilang siya.

"Ha?" I asked and I felt my face slowly turned into red.

"Para naman sa grade eh" pahabol niya pa as he took a bite of smores

"Sige… Okay lang… Para sa grade naman yun eh" I stuttered.

"Yeah, para sa grade."

"Sige, para sa grade."

"So… Monday, 5pm?"

"Sure para sa grade, haha" It was so awkward but I can't help but to smile since it's like he was asking me out on a date.

"Okay then…" he answered as he took the last sip of his coffee.

To be continued…